Meditation Insights: Emotions and the Body

When I was learning to meditate, I was intrigued by the instruction to turn attention to my body when I felt an emotion. It seems obvious now. Definitely some 20/20 hindsight going on, but I want to say that I lived my life up until then believing that emotions were in my head. That thoughts and feelings occurred in that same place.

One of the reasons this seems so obviously wrong to me now is how pervasive the feeling actually is in the body. It's so clear now, especially with emotions like fear and anxiety, that they live almost entirely in the body. Indeed, they take over the body in its entirety.

The only explanation for my misunderstanding that I can come up with is that I found these feelings so unpleasant and unacceptable, that I ran from them. I did everything I could to turn away from them.

Meditation taught me to embrace them. To step into them. To feel them fully. And it's made all the difference.

I had heard cliches that also now in hindsight seem like good, practical advice. Face your fears. Darkness can't exist in the light. But until I received the instruction to sit quietly, focus on my breath, and only then become aware of the energy in my body, did I realize that stress, fear, and anxiety are actually physical pains in the body.

The act of "noting" helped a lot, and I credit quite gratefully the Headspace app and Andi Puddicombe for introducing me to this technique. 

The instruction came after a period of first learning to sit quietly and become aware of the breath. Even this takes a while. The mind really is a monkey mind just jumping from one thing to the next. But then, once settling in watch for thoughts and watch for emotions and simply note them. "This is a thought." "This is an emotion." And I think most importantly, do not judge them. Only label them thought or emotion, and not as good or bad. 

Like men, all thoughts and all emotions are created equal.

A great example of this I read the other day is that fear is simply excitement without breathing. Reflect and ponder on that one for a while. 

Becoming aware (turning the light on) of a debilitating and painful emotion (darkness) and stepping into it and looking for it and really looking, makes it go away. Or rather, allows it to go away. 

Emotions are just energy that want to pass through the body. But for some reason, at least in my case, I often stopped them from doing so. Sometimes to a point of nearly incapacitating myself from connecting to anything or anyone else. Why I more frequently and easily held onto fear and anxiety, rather than say happiness, well...the meditation journey continues. I do smile a lot more these days.

Trying to ignore the emotion, or replace it with another, or cover i
t up with booze or television, is simply ineffective. It fails. Instead, embrace it. Appreciate it. Be grateful for it. It's there, in all its ultimate uselessness, to try to protect you and keep you safe. So, thank it for that. Love it for that. And then let it go on its way. That's where it's supposed to go. Let it.