Whose Opinion Matters?

I delivered some work recently, with ambitious objectives, and under tight deadline. I've been in the high tech industry for 25 years. I think it was some of the best, smartest, and insightful work I've ever done. Additionally, it was one of the most rewarding high pressure projects I've ever been on, and I've been on a lot.

What made it so rewarding is how calm and composed I was compared to high-pressure instances of my past. While several factors contributed to this, I give the vast majority of credit to my meditation practice and the ability to acknowledge the intensity of emotions, yet not get caught up in them.

The feedback I received, however, was not great. "A base hit, but not a home run" was the crux of it. Not terrible. Not even that bad. Maybe even acceptable or good.  But not at all the same self-assessment I concluded on my own.

But I took it hard. I've been ruminating on it. Something I thought I'd been able to get past. But it's sticking with me and I'm a bit off balance in what exactly to make of the whole thing.

I've given it lots of thought. Too much thought. And I can't make sense of it. Am I wrong and the feedback is right? But I can defend each point. I truly believe the critic's point of view here is off, inaccurate, and unjustified.

Is this hubris on my part? Did I misjudge my own performance? And misjudge it severely?

And yet, here I sit. Whose opinion matters more? I struggle to know.