A Year Without Alcohol: A Silver Bullet

I have been and continue to be motivated by this suspicion that giving up alcohol will prove to be a silver bullet for many, most, or even all my problems. It occupies a space in my mind like a skeleton key: Problem with work? Not drinking will solve it. Problem with a relationship? Not drinking will solve it. Problem with motivation? Not drinking will solve it.

I know this is incredibly naive. Yet, I willingly relish in it.

The social media algorithms have kicked in and my feeds are now flooded with testimonials from celebrities and influencers about the topic of giving up drinking.

The soundbites are compelling. 

"My life has changed." 

"There's me before I stopped drinking, and there's me after."

"My career was good. I stopped drinking and my career was great. Beyond my wildest dreams."

The soundbites don't tell the whole story. Theyare statements that over-simplify the journey. Selective reminiscences. 

One of the initial draws of my accident with abstinence was this hope that by the end of 2024, I'd be a better me and be granted access to all the things that have eluded me so far: lasting happiness, a fit body, creative success, productive entrepreneurship.

And while this first month of sobriety has brought concrete benefits: I sleep better, I think more clearly, I am more productive....it has also exposed some things that have been hidden or ignored. 

My body has persistent aches and pains. All over.  The buzz of a drink no longer dampens and the hangover no longer masks it. 

The passage of time more frequently slows, bringing with it a sense of mild wonder and regret about how much time was wasted in the fog of intoxication. 

Boredom shines light on how much awful programming is available to stream in limitless quantities.

A friend who I admire greatly calls alcohol a "numbing agent." And in its recent absence, I'm seeing that to be true. 

The absence of alcohol is not so much a key to unlock things as it is a weight to put down, which liberates energy and momentum.

Since I stopped drinking, I've noticed a renewed sense of awareness of things that I developed a habit of pushing aside. I have an increased sensitivity to the "feeling in the room." It's like the mental and emotional volume of those around me has been dialed up, whereas before they were regularly muted. The increased awareness is accompanied by a sense of clarity and confidence in tuning into relationships a bit deeper. There's a magnetism to the energy, and it seems the outcome is not just that I'm a bit happier, but also that those around me are too.

My suspicion that quitting alcohol is a silver bullet persists. There's a universal sharpness and sensitivity that's exposed with the abandonment of the numbing agent. The nature of the monster is changing. The silver bullet is solving for things, quite subtle things, that I had forgotten were threats to my well-being.